Hope has arrived

Wednesday all seven siblings were at Dad's house to go through some of Mom's things. Mom had always been a keeper, and after our house burned down 18 years ago, she really held on to things. Their house was always fuller than Dad wanted it to be. He especially wanted us each to pick one item of Mom's as a remembrance. Some things had already been decided, like her engagement and mother's rings. I struggled with what to choose. JJ wanted the piano. Dad hadn't intended us to choose furniture, but it was such an appropriate choice. Cali and I both have our late father-in-laws' pianos and Lu also has a piano. JJ is a much better piano player than I am and it always seemed wrong that I had a piano and she didn't.

Duff's first item was an old trunk he and Mom had redone together. We opened it up and there were bags labeled for each of us filled with our baby clothes. My daughter will be baptized in one of the dress from my bag.

I finally decided to go with her pearl necklace and earrings. I don't have strong memories of her wearing them, but they are something I will wear and know they were my mother's. Then we took turns choosing pieces of Mom's jewelery. One item I choose was one of her magnetic necklaces that binds to itself. I like the look okay, but I'll never forget her playing with the necklace with my guys.

We went through Mom's clothing, much of it will be donated, but most of us choose an item or two that we could either wear or it reminded us strongly of Mom. Then we went through some other items. Dad will be staying in the house for at least the next year and didn't want it emptied, but there were things he wanted us to go through. The day went pretty well, there were some tears, of course. I didn't cry though which kinda surprised me. We did not argue at all, there may have been some slights, there were a few items more than one of us wanted. But we did not argue. We discussed and relented and I think for the most part we are all satisfied. I am; I made an effort to only take what I would either use or really reminded me of Mom.

I started having some contractions late in the afternoon, harder than I'd had most the day. AJ and Cali lightly poked me in the tummy to try and encourage more contractions. They both had to go home on Thursday and they wanted Little Miss to be born sooner rather than later. Their prodding worked, I had more contractions. The plan had been for Dad to give me a ride home since I could drive the hour myself. As we had gone through stuff, I'd been putting mine in Dad's car. Suddenly, Dad realized that I was walking slower and stopping to take deep breaths. He decided to bring me home immediately! It was like a sitcom with everyone frantically trying to get me out the door. I said I didn't think anything would happen that night. Dad said he had heard my mother say that more than once and it was time to go! He hadn't delivered any of his children and he did not intend to deliver a grandchild. The ride home was quiet. I tried hard not to annoy my dad with idle chit chat. I had a couple contractions in the car, but they weren't too bad.

When I got home I decided it was time to have this baby. She would be born sometime in the next 10 days, why not now? So instead of laying down I started cleaning, bending down to load the dishwasher, going up and down the stairs several times. I started having more hard contractions, I kept going. Finally we decided to head to the hospital just before 8 pm. We live less than four blocks away so we walked. I figured that would help things along. The guys walked along, my MIL picked them up from the hospital.

The nurse who checked me first said I was dilated to 5, on Monday my doctor said I was 4-5. I was so worried they would send me home. The nurse said my doctor would make that decision when she got there. I did not want to go home! My doctor got there and checked. She said I was 5-6, 70% effaced and had a bulging bag. I could stay, we would be having a baby! I actually yelled "Yippee" out loud. It was the happiest I'd been in a couple weeks.

My doctor asked if I'd rather her break my water first or have the epidural. I'd been having second thoughts about the epidural, until I had another hard contraction then I decided I should have a contractions. I'd had an epidural with my first, but hadn't thought it had help much until I had my second with nothing. So I had the epidural. Holy crap, it was awesome! I barely noticed when they broke my water. They had to tell me when I was having contractions.

I spent the next hour and a half waiting to dilate. My doctor sat in the rocking chair and we chit chatted. Jim walked home to get the car and my overnight bag. I hadn't wanted to take it in case they sent me home, superstitious I guess. My doctor went to check on a few things. While I was alone, I got a little weepy, which I guess is going to happen.

My doctor checked me again and I was still 6, I stayed a six for an hour and a half. My mom had had really fast deliveries, I knew she would be wondering what was taking me so long. I called AJ to let her know what was happening. Then I asked her to come be with me. I'd never had anyone in the delivery room besides Jim before. But I wanted one of my sister with me, or even two. Jim and I had joked about it before, but I knew he would be okay with it. AJ and JJ decided to come down. Five minutes later I was dilated to 7. Still wasn't feeling a thing, in fact my legs were completely numb by this point. With Jim and my doctor back I was joking and giggling. It could not have been more different from my other deliveries.

25 minutes into my sisters' hour drive, my doctor checked again and it was time to push. I really had no idea, one heck of an epidural! 15 minutes and 3 hard pushes later Hope Athena entered the world. She is so lovely, with the longest fingers I have ever seen. She is 7 pounds and 11 ounces, and 20 inches long. My sisters got her about 15 minutes after she was born. Cali and my dad came on their way to the airport. Cali kept thanking me for having Hope before she left. Peg came in the afternoon as did my mom's only sister. I wish Mom was here, but to quote Anne Lemott, "It isn't nearly enough, but somehow it is."